According to Business 2.0, I should reelly, realy lern to spell chek this blog before publishig it. Because if I do, I could get people to read it, then sell ad space and earn buckets and buckets and buckets...
pardon me, we now take a break from our regularly scheduled blogging while the Mama goes and drools over her poor, battered budget. We appreciate your readership. Your readership is important to us. Thank you for waiting.
...of cash. Enough to send the kids to the Waldorf (thought I was going to say Montessori, did'ja?) religious school of choice. Hell, enough to fund a school that works according to my philosophies of religious and pedagogical practice. While I go and get a facial. And a massage. While a chef - no, wait - a landscaper - ah, no I kind of like doing those parts. Call me unfeminist, but there it is.
Here, according to the wisdom of Business 2.0, (the September 2006 issue, list by Saheli S.R. Datta) are the 7 habits of highly effective bloggers [sic].
* focus on a narrow niche.
Okay, anyone out there interested in kids, hemophilia and enough allergies to field a cricket team? To humble Jamie Oliver and Alton Brown? Do I hear crickets? Right, then. Moving on to
*set up your own blog, complete with permalinks.
Um, right. I'll just pop out and learn HTML, Dreamweaver and perhaps a wee bit o Java, shall I? (Extremely obscure Douglas Adams reference there, people. Anyone? This would be part of that niche thing, I think.) Or I could set the Eldest loose. He's been singing in his own language lately, perhaps he programs in it, too?
*Think of the blog as a database. Cite authors and publications by name, use tags, keywords, categories.
Tags? What's a tag? I do like me organization, though. Can there be nice, matching containers with pretty lids on?
* Blog frequently and regularly, if possible at least half a dozen posts before lunchtime on weekdays.
Apparently, you lot read things at lunch. Who knew? And who the hell has time to post that much? Read that much? I'm not boing boing, people. Not even one fourth of the boing boing. Of course, if I let the Eldest post, now...but he'd need to learn to spell better first. Or would he?
* Use striking images.
Naugahyde. In 98 degree heat. With dog hair. That do ya? (Again, anyone for the reference?)
*Enable comments and interact with your readers.
Hey, how you doin'? (Anyone? Anyone at all? Sigh.)
*Make friends with other bloggers.
Yup. And then we can all read each other, like one big happy fambily...hey there, jgfellow, how you doin' there, darlin'? Yup, that does seem to work.
And yet the budget is still battered. Well, jg-man, I can hear you pointing out that perhaps, perhaps, were I not to insist on getting the big hunks of broken glass out of the backyard, we'd have a slightly healthier budget.
And nowhere for the kiddo to play with that monstrous kiddie basketball hoop you hauled home, dear. And who the hell decided that a newly gut rehabbed building would be made pretty with landfill? I know it was the seventies, but still. Landfill!!? I've been picking chunks of glass out of the garden for the past two years.
Maybe I should reread that list, then, eh?